Making Tracks
By Kat Bryant
Last week, my son turned 25. (Which is a miracle, because I’m still 29.)
Garrett doesn’t view birthdays as a big deal. I tend not to, either, though I like to joke about it. So I called him to wish him a happy Taco Day, and we had a nice chat.
He had aced an exam he’d been worried about, and was studying hard for the next one. We discussed his latest plans for the future, which change often, but always point toward the same goal: to become a nurse and help people for the rest of his life.
We (not just us, but humans in general) tend to discuss the future without caveat. We assume we’ll be around to see our plans through. We assume we’re going to wake up the next morning and continue our day-to-day lives. Unless we have information to the contrary, it rarely occurs to us that this might not happen.
And yet it can.
The day after Garrett’s 25th birthday, we learned that one of his best friends — one of “my boys” from our Boy Scout troop in Arizona — had been killed in a car accident at age 24.
Jean was a great kid — the oldest of four brothers, all of whom were under my wing, so to speak, in the Scouts. He always had a smile on his face and had a heart the size of Texas. And no wonder: His parents, whom I count among my dearest friends, are two of the most caring people I know — fiercely devoted to family and close friends alike.
Jean matured into a young man any mom would be proud of. He was blissfully in love with his wife, and a doting father to their three children. His future held nothing but happiness and hope.
… And then, suddenly, nothing at all.
My heart shrieked in pain at the news. It hurt for Jean, for his parents, for his brothers, for the family he had created for himself.
Above all, I feel empathy with his mom, my friend of 10 years. I can’t even begin to fathom the thought of losing a child I had birthed, nurtured for two decades and proudly sent into the world to make his own way. I wish her the superhuman strength she’ll need to get through this, along with her husband and her other three sons.
As a mom, I know it would break me into pieces that might never fit together again.
From this point on, I will celebrate my own son’s birthdays, successes and other milestones with even more enthusiasm. And I will continue to revel in his ever-changing plans for the future.
Because although I realize I can’t just assume he has one, I need to believe it.
Kat Bryant is lifestyle editor of The Daily World, editor of Washington Coast Magazine, and proud mother. Reach her at kbryant@thedailyworld.com or on Facebook at Kat Bryant-DailyWorld.
