Dear Abby: I was deeply hurt after going to a barbecue at my oldest daughter’s home. It was to celebrate my granddaughter’s fourth birthday. My daughter’s husband is from Thailand. He barbecued beautiful dishes of shrimp and something that looked like a gigantic crawfish. While my daughter is accustomed to and enjoys this food, she and her husband are aware that I, my husband, her sister and her niece are not accustomed to it. We simply do not like the flavor and texture.
When I asked my daughter if there were any hot dogs they could grill, at least for my 9-year-old granddaughter, she got angry and said she eats what her husband cooks. I felt our part of the family was not even being considered. I was hurt for my youngest daughter and my other granddaughter, who had literally nothing to eat that they would even remotely like. Am I wrong for feeling ignored being invited to a barbecue where my daughter knew all the food being offered were things we wouldn’t like?
Ruined My Appetite
Dear Ruined: I do think you are blowing this out of proportion. I assume you have been invited to your daughter’s and son-in-law’s before, and knew her husband does the cooking. Before coming over, you should have asked if it would be all right to bring a few traditional American dishes with you for the children. If your offer was refused, you could have skipped the barbecue. That said, look at the big picture. It was only one afternoon. I assume the kids were taken out for burgers or hot dogs afterward, and no serious harm was done.
Dear Abby: I am a news nut. Since adolescence I have loved watching the news and staying informed about current events. I also have had a problem since childhood. When I see a person get an injection, I have a physical reaction. I shiver from head to toe. Because of the pandemic, I can no longer watch news broadcasts because they constantly show folks getting vaccinated. Does anyone else have the same reaction? Any suggestions?
Squeamish in Canada
Dear Squeamish: I am sure more people than you think have significant reactions regarding needles. A dear friend of mine must lie down before any procedure involving a needle because she faints. In your case, because news anchors usually announce before commercial breaks what will be featured “right after this important message from our sponsor,” take note of it and turn your head, change the channel or leave the TV until the next segment.
Dear Abby: What do you do with a large family picture of yourself, your husband, your son and your daughter-in-law who is no longer your daughter-in-law? She and my son divorced after nine years of marriage. He has since remarried. I don’t want to hang the picture, but I don’t know what to do with it. Any help would be appreciated.
Out of the Picture in Alabama
Dear Out: Try this: Reach out to your former daughter-in-law and ask whether she would like to have the picture. If she is interested, offer it to her. If she’s not, feel free to toss it.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.