By Mark Harvey
This week, like last week, I want to begin with the most important things I’m going to say: 877-734-6277 or (TTY) 360-664-9469.
Those are the phone numbers we can use to contact Adult Protective Services. What would we report? Anything we might suspect constitutes abuse (physical, mental, sexual or personal exploitation), abandonment, neglect, financial exploitation or self-neglect of a “vulnerable adult.”
Who’s a “vulnerable adult”? Anyone 60 or better who lacks the ability to care for themselves (for whatever reason), or has a legal guardian or a developmental disability, resides in a facility or receives any kind of care in their homes, like home health, hospice, etc. — including “private pay.”
If you think harm is happening to someone right now, call the cops right now and worry about APS later.
Yes, your confidentiality will be protected; and yes, you’ll be immune from liability if you’re reporting in “good faith.” You don’t have to be “right” and you don’t have to be able to “prove” anything — you just have to care.
That gets us to today.
So, what will APS actually do? They’ll attempt to make an unannounced visit, to try to see what’s actually going on — and they won’t hesitate to call the cops, if they think that’s what needs to happen.
They’ll talk with the person in question, trying to understand what’s going on. They’ll look and listen and smell. And they might talk with (and listen to) anyone else who seems to be on the scene, trying to figure out what’s actually going on and whether this “vulnerable adult” actually needs help.
So, let’s say the person does seem to need help, but there isn’t any imminent harm or danger or any evidence of actual illegal activity — what then? (This is the hard part for many of us.) They’ll sit down with that person and offer help, whatever that “help” might look like.
Most of us have heard of CPS (Child Protective Services) and some of the horror stories those folks run into (and they’re true), and we’ve heard of them removing the child from the home. So we hear “APS” and we reasonably assume the same; but we’re wrong. The person in question has to consent to any services offered.
Why? Think about it: They haven’t forfeited their civil rights — their right to make their own decisions, whether we like them or not — just because they happen to be “vulnerable.” Still having trouble with it? I’ve been there, too. But imagine if it were you: Would you want somebody charging into your life and deciding where you can or can’t live, or what you can or can’t do, or who you can or can’t have in your life? Right: It gets dicey.
Certainly, APS has the ability and the responsibility to file for a guardianship if the person is clearly unable to function, and there’s no other way. Often, people do consent to accept help — and often, APS will work with law enforcement to solve a “problem,” and sometimes, just being on the scene is enough to make bad guys go away and/or knock it off. But sometimes, nothing happens because the person won’t allow anything to happen and they can still call their own shots.
Yes, it can be frustrating and heartbreaking. But we cared enough to try.
I want to insert a word to “caregivers,” and we know who we are: folks who are taking care of someone who needs to be taken care of, whether they like it or not.
It is, in my opinion, the toughest work there is; especially if it’s 24/7/365 — it just goes on and on and on. We can never do enough or do it well enough and, often, we know darned good and well that it’s not going to get any better. And today looks just like yesterday and tomorrow, and it goes on and on and.…
We’re human, and once in a great while, we “lose it.” Maybe we raise our voices or even holler, or maybe we drop a tray or slam a door, or maybe we say something we know is stupid, like, “What’s the matter with you?!”
We didn’t mean to — it all just caved in on us, and we lost it. Do I think that’s OK? No, and neither do you. But do I think it’s “abuse”? No, I don’t.
Now, if you’re hurting someone or depriving them of things or neglecting them, I’ll be the first one to call APS, and I’ll do it so fast it’ll scare you. But most of the time, all you’ve done is qualify as a human being. So learn from it, think about getting some help for yourself (yes, I might be able to help) and move on.
Many of us have heard the phrase “mandated reporters,” which refers to folks who, because of their profession or employment, might become aware of or suspect abuse; that’s folks like me, or any medical professionals, or in-home care workers, or anyone else who’s “in the business.” If you suspect it, you’re required — by law — to report it to APS.
“But, what if I’m wrong?” So what if you are? What happens then is nothing. Life goes on. Nothing happens to you or to anyone else. You were just wrong; it happens to all of us.
Enough. Please keep those phone numbers where you can actually find them, and please care enough to use them. Abuse, exploitation and neglect don’t lurk around every corner or behind every drawn curtain, but they do happen. One of the reasons it doesn’t happen more is enough of us decided to say “Enough.”
Mark Harvey is the director of information and assistance for the Olympic Area Agency on Aging. He can be reached by email at harvemb@dshs.wa.gov; by phone at 360-532-0520 in Aberdeen, 360-942-2177 in Raymond, or 360-642-3634; or through Facebook at Olympic Area Agency on Aging-Information &Assistance.
