Dear Abby: One way to measure success is how your kids describe you

My son and his wife just gave us the news that they are expecting their first child.

Dear Abby: My son and his wife just gave us the news that they are expecting their first child. They have waited five years for this wonderful milestone, and I am delighted. I know they will be excellent parents.

I remember seeing a short poem in your column called “Success.” Could you reprint it? I’d like to clip it and give it to the parents-to-be.

Marie

In Dayton, Ohio

Dear Marie: I’m glad to oblige, and I hope your son and daughter-in-law will enjoy it. It was penned by Martin Buxbaum, a noted poet from Maryland who passed away in 1991. It’s included in my “Keepers” booklet, which is a collection of often-requested gems that have appeared in this column. Because so many readers asked for copies of them, they were turned into a booklet. Read on:

SUCCESS

You can use any measure

When you’re speaking of success.

You can measure it in fancy home,

Expensive car or dress.

But the measure of your real success

Is the one you cannot spend.

It’s the way your kids describe you

When they’re talking to a friend.

“Keepers” covers subjects ranging from temptation to forgiveness, animals, children and human nature. It can be ordered by sending your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $7 in U.S. funds to: Dear Abby Keepers, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. Shipping and handling are included in the price. Filled with down-to-earth nuggets of wisdom, both witty and philosophical, “Keepers” is a quick and easy read, and an inexpensive, welcome gift for newly married couples, pet lovers, new parents or anyone recovering from an illness.

Dear Abby: My husband wants to be with other women. He has spent the last 12 years asking for a threesome. I love him and don’t want to share him with the world, but he doesn’t love me the same.

We have been together more than 29 years. He says he just wants to have fun. Since I’m not interested in swinging with him and others, should I just get a divorce? I believe he won’t be complete until he gets to enjoy his life the way he wants, and I’m tired of having my feelings hurt each time he meets someone he wants to be with.

I’m a 51-year-old woman who is still very sexually active, yet I am not enough for him. I have tried everything. I’m tired. Dear Abby, please help.

Doesn’t Want to Share Him

Dear Doesn’t Want to Share Him: Because your husband wants an open marriage and you don’t, it appears the two of you have reached an impasse. Your husband craves the one thing no one woman can give him — variety. It has nothing to do with your not being “enough.” For this reason you should consult an attorney about your options. I am truly sorry for your pain.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.